2 months

Whoo Hoo 2 stone in 2 months!!!

First post

This is my first weight loss post - I'll share all here...

I have a relationship with food - I would say that I love it but it's not that... I hoover it up without looking, thinking or feeling anything - like a means to an end I keep eating until it's gone - never full or hungry, it's just a habit - a way of life.

Bouncing between diets I came to realise that it's not the diet that doesn't work it's my passion and commitment that always goes 'by the by'. When I was 15st 5lb size 22 in the 90's luckily enough that was when my first husband left me for another woman - nothing like a lack of confidence and self esteem to bring out the powerful spirit in me...

Putting on weight was never tied in with who I was, I've never been embarassed or felt less of a person because regardless of my weight I have always felt beautiful - everyone has the right to be beautiful - whether others agree or not! I needed to take back some control in my life so I monitored what I ate.

In a year I dropped to a size 12 10st 10lb and it felt amazing... I did this by going to the gym every day after dropping the kids to school - I lived in a tracksuit and ate things that I considered 'safe' eg jacket potato with tuna and side salad. Trouble was that I couldn't work out how to 'maintain' and people were starting to say how ill/drawn I was looking. At that time I got viral meningitis and spent 10 days in hospital followed by months of physio therapy to get my balance back. I had taken diet and exercise to an extreme and as I was doing it alone I didn't have any reason to go back to that way so I started eating 'normally'.

14 years later I find myself at 18st 8lb and I went to the doctors to enquire about a gastric band - The Dr felt my abdomen and said that there was a lump... it was investigated - turned out there were 6 rare tumours that needed to come out. Jan 2012 I had the tumours out (weighing 11lb) in major surgery and found that they were low grade malignant sarcoma's. I was very worried that my weight would bring about issues in the op. I have some nerve damage, but, I'm alive. Dr said that he has got them all out but if they grow back there will need to be another op - this means that I will have to drastically lose weight. Oooo, okay then (easier said than done).

I'm going to need to call on my inner strength again... I have all the magic ingredients, a wonderful loving husband, gorgeous children who support and love me, beauty, plus, power.